Who should replace Morgan Freeman as the voice of Translink?

Here are a few suggestions on who should replace Morgan Freeman as the voice of Vancouver's transit system

Credit: Deadpool Movie on Twitter

A day after the announcement that he would be heard aboard Vancouver’s transit airwaves, the veteran actor is in hot water

It was hard to find a single person who disagreed with the decision to let Morgan Freeman announce sweet nothings into the ears of Vancouver commuters yesterday.

It now appears that the actor won’t, in fact, be heard on Metro Vancouver’s buses and trains as he’s in hot water over allegations of sexual misconduct.

Now, TransLink is under the gun a little bit as it has nothing to replace what were essentially advertisements for Visa which Vancouver transit users will be able to tap to pay for fares this summer.

The organization will ostensibly see a bit of a drop in public perception after the fiasco, so it might want to look at some homegrown candidates to replace the Academy Award winner.

Here are a few suggestions:

Michael J. Fox

The actor recently underwent spinal surgery, but he says he’s feeling great and looking forward to golfing this summer. So it shouldn’t be too much to ask Fox to head into the recording studio and extoll the virtues of TransLink’s partnership with Visa. 

Potential go-to phrase: “Where we’re going, we very much need roads.”

Carly Rae Jepsen

The songstress was scheduled for an album release in early 2018, but that hasn’t materialized yet. If she wants to add some publicity for her fourth LP, the 32-year-old Mission native might want to consider getting a head start on embedding herself into people’s earlobes.

Potential go-to phrase: “Is this really, really, really your stop?” 

Trevor Linden

While the president of the Vancouver Canucks probably has enough on his plate, he’d be a calm, steady voice if things go horribly wrong. He has plenty of practice in that exact situation.

Potential go-to phrase: “There’s been a problem with one of the service lines. Don’t worry; everything will soon be back on track, just like it is with the Vancouver Canucks’ rebuild.

Nardwuar

Full buses and untimely delays can sometimes cause transit riders to become agitated. The perfect antidote? Nardwuar the Human Serviette’s unbridled positivity! That’ll work.

Potential go-to phrase: “Keep on riding in the free world, doot doota loot do!”

Bob Rennie

This wouldn’t be at all controversial, right? One of the city’s most notorious real estate moguls, the ‘Condo King’ knows Vancouver better than most. 

Potential go-to phrase: “And if you look to your right, you’ll see my recent developments that you’ll never afford.” 

Ryan Reynolds/Deadpool

The only question here is whether Reynolds would choose to portray his famous superhero or not. It might feel less promotional if he dropped the Deadpool act, but we think he could pull it off either way.

Potential go-to phrase: “And now we’re coming up on what used to be the Georgia Viaduct. Ah, that nostalgia hits like a swift kick to the shins.”

Gregor Robertson

While some residents are likely to be sick of the soon-to-be former mayor, Robertson played a fundamental role in guiding some of the city’s transit infrastructure. Maybe he’s deserved the right to lord that over Vancouver’s citizens.

Potential go-to phrase: “Did you know that by choosing to take transit instead of driving you’re helping to save our planet from the terrors of global warming?”
 

Seth Rogen

This is already getting some legs, as Rogen responded on Twitter to a call asking for him to step up. Hearing that hearty laugh come through the speakers would certainly liven up some dreary days on the bus. It would also nicely coincide with marijuana legalization in Canada, allowing the comedian to bust out some pot puns.

Potential go-to phrase: “I know what you’re thinking, but please wait until you’re off the bus to roll up a fatty. And then I will come and join you.”

John Shorthouse 

One of the most recognizable voices in Vancouver would surely be a welcome addition to many commuters’ days, as his folksy baritone might even appeal to some non-Canucks fans. 

Potential go-to phrase: “Great save by…you! Using your Visa card to tap into Vancouver’s transit system saves you money and time!”

Tamara Taggart

Vancouverites were shocked when former CTV anchor Taggart was unceremoniously let go last month. There would no doubt be a strong contingent of residents who would appreciate hearing her voice once again.

Potential go-to phrase: “Please treat your fellow transit riders with more respect than I was given at CTV.”